Americans like guns, and then I caught a fish.

Last weekend I put on a plaid pearl snap shirt, tucked it into a new pair of blue jeans, pulled on a pair of leather cowboy boots, and topped it all off with a camouflage truckers cap. Why? Because I was invited to a party, it was an Australian backyard BBQ and beer drink’n afair, and I wanted to do my best to represent ‘merica. So in addition to my outfit I bought 12 cans of some of the most marginal beer I thought a country bumpkin from the U.S. would drink in Australia (XXXX Gold). The first response I got at the party was “Where’s your shotgun?”. This, so far, is the story of my Australian experience. Having a large beard combined with wearing plaid shirts and blue jeans incites questions of my relationship to firearms from most Australians. To be fair, if I wear the same “costume” in the states (which I often do), most American citizens would probably assume that I am a gun owner and perhaps an obsessive firearms enthusiast; I am the former but certainly not the latter.

However, while gun-owning-beard-grower is the category I am put in by people my age or much older than I am, younger Australians have a more deductive approach to categorizing me. The most recent example being yesterday. I left my house in the afternoon to walk over to campus, 7 young boys were throwing a cricket ball around and riding bikes in front of my house. As I walked outside, one of them exclaimed that I looked like Osama Bin Laden, and the interaction went as follows.

I said: “His beard wasn’t red, dude”.

Responding to the sound of my accent he said: “You should die your beard black then; wait, are you scottish!?”

me: “Not only are you likely color blind, but your ears don’t work so good either”.

as I walked away from the mob of boys, one of them shouted, “Oh!, he’s American”

I hollered back “Bingo!”

Since the accent didn’t initially give it away, I assume it was my poor grammar that clued him in.

I won’t draw any conclusions from these events with a half-hearted attempt to compare and contrast American and Australian culture. One of my 11 readers might take it too seriously. There really isn’t a conclusion to be drawn anyway, I might have forgotten about any of this, had I not decided to make a blog entry about it. So to end this entry on an unrelated matter, I caught another fish on the fly-rod here in Australia. It’s a Dusky Flat Head, and by no means large, but any fish caught on the fly is a good fish.

 

 

Deceased Delphinidae

What’s that there?

Do it be a dead whale?

It is indeed a dead whale!

Apparently it died smiling

I went down to Glenrock State Park and Beach yesterday. I intended to try some fishing, but the fish weren’t biting. So I mainly hiked around looking at what the tide pushed in,  which interestingly enough turned out to be a species of toothed whale! You may ask, “Drew, how do you know it’s a tooth whale?” Well, I’d answer this question with an equally dumb question, “look at the picture, it gots teeth don’t it?” As for the species, well I dunno I ain’t no Whale Biologist. But much like a whale biologist I do call’s um like I see’s um, and my guess is that this is a pygmy killer whale, because like a good 21st naturalist, I googled it and that’s what it looks most like.

While I was taking pictures of this bloated smiley carcass, I did notice that it had an interesting scar

Delicious whale flesh!

Those of you who know me would say “Drew, that’s obviously where you sliced a chunk of the whale’s flesh to take home, wrap it in bacon, grill it and eat it” to which I would reply “fair suggestion, but no, I did not do that” I do not know what that suspiciously square incision is, but my guess is that it’s some sort of biopsy taken to be analyzed by local marine biologists. You may ask “Drew, who are these marine biologists, and what will they learn from the biopsy?” To which I would reply “Dammit, I dunno leave me alone and let me enjoy this dead whale!!!”

Google Earth Coordinates in Decimal Degrees -32.964591324° 151.736931116°